WindupSkeleton
[14] Master
I guess I can show you now if you're around?
A tale of souls and swords, eternally retold...
- Thread starter VILARCANE
- Start date
I guess I can show you now if you're around?
VILARCANE
[14] Master
Let me know when you think you'll be around the next few days (french time) as we might have a better chance bumping into each other...
VILARCANE
[14] Master
Didn't i do my share of Sci-fi CAS as well, so while Brucege is brewing a new batch of reviews (lol), why not drop my newest (and only) sci-fi novelette here...
Records of Bolos Wars (a Sci-Fi novelette by Vilarcane)
---
DigiRcord ™ of Space Marine T.Hank synaptic pairing, YYY 3013 (Yerkes Spectral Year)
Asteroid Perseus QX25, for billions of year, this chunk of rock just sat there in the most god forsaken quadrant of the multiverse, cooking up its special brand of Pm61, an energy source so powerful it could either fuel an entire planet or blow it to hell.
We needed this badly, terraforming on HR 465 (Andromeda Star System) was consuming all of our resources and manpower, and we were running out of time, with short supplies of components and parts to maintain our aging reaper-class mining ships and freighters.
That and we’d bled everything dry within our reach, from all kinds of planets and asteroid fields to class L, Y and even methane dwarves. Since we first discovered liquid water on HD85512b thanks to a handful of peeping tom astronomers from earth, centuries ago, nothing seemed mission impossible to the brass.
Our science pukes and bulbheads back home even sent thousands of probes to search for this crap, promethium, named after some kind of ancient god or something.
And once we found the motherload, shit, everything went ballistic after a while, mark my words !
All started well though, we arrived first, and laid claim to these barren lands, now it was our rock, and our ore…and business was good, unlike the synthetic crap they fed us called Nutrifluid !
I was dispatched there on security detail for the expensive payload carriers and engineering teams, hell I even got a pay raise (more of a premium risk I guess).
That and I was part of the big boys now, and man I looked the part : class Jugg’ body armor with all nooks and crannies, a brand-new 3014’ edition scoped beamrifle with biometric trigger and synaptic aiming. The prototype silvery gray Vanadium alloyed VR helmet was the icing on the cake, light, compact and connected !
The complete tactical gear probably cost more than my life earnings, past, present and future !
This is why the whole shebang smelled so funny, like the human race was throwing everything it got left at this rocky hell, in a last primal act of survival instinct.
I felt the weight of millions of souls on my shoulders...
I should have smelled something else though, that was was about to hit the fan…big time !
A tricade after the Bolos-Amφ arrived, another species of the Bolos we repelled in the Algol cluster.
Sure they still were hell of a lot different than us : about twice our size, four-armed, with the ability to sustain high level of radioactivity and breathe underwater. From a distance, they looked like anthromorphic squids or batracians, all wrapped in a chitin eskoxel..ksel…thing !
Below two pairs of globulous dark eyes, a set of gills hid thousands of tiny vocal cords.
The branchiae not only allowed them to breathe liquid but also to produce all kinds of sounds and vibrations, making them the ultimate interpreter, able to mimic even the most complex verbal languages, be it Ascari, Drhell, Volus…and of course human tongue.
The structure of their brain was a complete mystery though, as none of our lab rats had set his paws on a living specimen…as for the dead ones, the inside of their head looked like a greenish sea sponge.
I knew cuz’ at the battle for the Demon star , I popped some of their cousins’ skull open with a nice headshot, hooah !
Anyways, I didn’t really give a Krogan’s tit about all this scientific babbling, what mattered is that they wanted the same god damn thing as we did, promethium, and lots of it at that !
A first, it looked like we’d get along just fine with the φ’s , but then something happened the brass obviously did not see coming, and things got pretty ugly, pardon my french…
Those amphibian warmongering bastards betrayed us and attacked civilians with full strength, in endless waves of psionic attacks and plasma bombs, and we got the shit kicked out of us.
Sure we fought back, but they had the element of surprise, and with reinforcements thousands of light-years away and unaware, it didn’t go so well…
We lost a squad, then two, then the ammo went scarce, then we started going melee against these hulks with plasma cutters scavenged from the dead miners. We had to do the job with sweet fuck all!
After shitting on our heads, the Bolos went underground close to the promethium core, cut off all communication with Central Command.
Again, they sent us, Space Legionnaires, to bury this place, cause “if we can’t have it, hell, bloody nobody can !” Admiral B. Lockhead’s own words.
Afer all, t’was with the Admiral it all started, at the big “peace” summit on QX25’s Citadel and military HQ.
The φ’s had been there for a while now, and the ore at the surface was nearly depleted, but everyone knew the core held some more of the stuff, “salts” as the white coats said, as it was combined with other elements deep under the thick crust of rock and metal.
We thought of asking the amphibians for help, but then they’d probably want a piece of the cake, so even grindmeat like me got that one right : one of us had to go, of its own free will, or with a marine’s boot up his alien ass…
Our boss made that quite clear to the squiddies in an exhilarating speech (yep I know sum’ fancy words), and even got me and my squad mates intimidated in the process.
The bluff seemed to be working, because I recall the Bolos warlord, suitably called “Amphi”, replying in stellar English, taking time to spell out each line of his answer very distinctively, knowing that any quiproquo would lead to retaliation with full prejudice from our superior forces (no kidding…) :
Amφ :
“I need to be frank and outspoken about this, so that you choose your course of action wisely…
I firmly believe…
That our two races can be sustained by the limited amount of promethium found on this planet
I refuse to think…
That war is the right path to go as the death toll on your side would be considerable
Therefore I can only conclude…
Humans and Bolos-Amφ can agree on a fair distribution of resources and wealth
And I seriously doubt…
This is going to end in some kind of Armageddon”
…
Damn, I was nothing but cannon fodder and a grunt, but I decided to play it safe and mentally input “Amphi Bolos” into my VR visor, scanning for known weaknesses, then I’d blow his fat face to smithereens with a well-aimed titanium round…oldschool !
I must have done some kind of mental typo cuz my HUD flashed with an antique Wikipedia page : Amphibolos, Greek word for sentences or phrases that can be read in more than one way”.
More than one way uh ?
I recalled the warlord’s speech and rolled it backwards mentally, line after line, and then two things hit me: starting from the end the speech told a whole different story, by the balls of the Elcor, now this is how their twisted mind worked !!!
…the second thing that struck me was the plasma pellet ripping through my body armor and lung…
The whole delegation were also down, shot in the back on their way out.
The admiral distorted face was frozen in a last stupid grin. What a clusterfuck !
As for me, I was barely conscious and choking in my own blood and puke when I saw the butt-ugly warlord bend over my smoking carcass, and I recall him whispering to me, very distinctively:
“Our forces will always prevail over you
I firmly believe!”
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
E-Librarian’s B. Ookworm comments and notes:
Following Grunt T.Hank’s respiratory failure and subsequent cardiac arrest, this DigiRcord ™ was automatically uploaded to central command cloud servers and classified “crimson” (confidential defense) for High Command Council’s eyes only.
Peace negotiation with QX25 colony were immediately resumed, and Arch-Commander Palin (whose xenobiologists eventually had access to a living Bolo specimen for brain matter analysis), only sent a brief three-word memo to the remaining confederal forces on Q’, hoping the Amφ overlord would intercept the communication :
“Draw, o coward !” so it read.
All Bolos listening to those words went bat-shit crazy, processing the message in endless loops, trying to decipher the secret code hidden behind it.
As a result, all Xenosettlers on QX25, Warlord included, soon died of synaptic overload, some highly contagious kind of alien meningitis.
Before drawing his last breath, the ill-advised “Amphi” spread the word to the rest of their hives, in an attempt to warn them from some deadly secret weapon.
It ended up turning the whole Bolos bloodline into an extinct species in a matter of minutes.
Instant supraneural communication has its downside after all.
Urged to reveal the recipe behind another glorious victory, Palin Drome burst out into laughter in front of the cheering crowd :
“Just had to live up to my name, gentlemen !”
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(*) DigiRcord™ is a proprietary technology that transcripts actual mental notes and thoughts into vocal records for instant archiving, on the fly audEbook™ creation, crime solving, matrimonial dispute cases, tax evading trials, among many other uses.
Charging only 1 credit per processed thought, it remains the best bang for your bucks!
Featuring smartfiltering of obscene thoughts for parental control purposes, this tool only pre-requires light synaptic surgery or DigiBrain™ nano-implant (all available at discount prices at your nearest virtual clinic).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Palindrome is a set of words that can be read both ways, like "Eva, can i see bees in a cave ?"
Records of Bolos Wars (a Sci-Fi novelette by Vilarcane)
---
DigiRcord ™ of Space Marine T.Hank synaptic pairing, YYY 3013 (Yerkes Spectral Year)
Asteroid Perseus QX25, for billions of year, this chunk of rock just sat there in the most god forsaken quadrant of the multiverse, cooking up its special brand of Pm61, an energy source so powerful it could either fuel an entire planet or blow it to hell.
We needed this badly, terraforming on HR 465 (Andromeda Star System) was consuming all of our resources and manpower, and we were running out of time, with short supplies of components and parts to maintain our aging reaper-class mining ships and freighters.
That and we’d bled everything dry within our reach, from all kinds of planets and asteroid fields to class L, Y and even methane dwarves. Since we first discovered liquid water on HD85512b thanks to a handful of peeping tom astronomers from earth, centuries ago, nothing seemed mission impossible to the brass.
Our science pukes and bulbheads back home even sent thousands of probes to search for this crap, promethium, named after some kind of ancient god or something.
And once we found the motherload, shit, everything went ballistic after a while, mark my words !
All started well though, we arrived first, and laid claim to these barren lands, now it was our rock, and our ore…and business was good, unlike the synthetic crap they fed us called Nutrifluid !
I was dispatched there on security detail for the expensive payload carriers and engineering teams, hell I even got a pay raise (more of a premium risk I guess).
That and I was part of the big boys now, and man I looked the part : class Jugg’ body armor with all nooks and crannies, a brand-new 3014’ edition scoped beamrifle with biometric trigger and synaptic aiming. The prototype silvery gray Vanadium alloyed VR helmet was the icing on the cake, light, compact and connected !
The complete tactical gear probably cost more than my life earnings, past, present and future !
This is why the whole shebang smelled so funny, like the human race was throwing everything it got left at this rocky hell, in a last primal act of survival instinct.
I felt the weight of millions of souls on my shoulders...
I should have smelled something else though, that was was about to hit the fan…big time !
A tricade after the Bolos-Amφ arrived, another species of the Bolos we repelled in the Algol cluster.
Sure they still were hell of a lot different than us : about twice our size, four-armed, with the ability to sustain high level of radioactivity and breathe underwater. From a distance, they looked like anthromorphic squids or batracians, all wrapped in a chitin eskoxel..ksel…thing !
Below two pairs of globulous dark eyes, a set of gills hid thousands of tiny vocal cords.
The branchiae not only allowed them to breathe liquid but also to produce all kinds of sounds and vibrations, making them the ultimate interpreter, able to mimic even the most complex verbal languages, be it Ascari, Drhell, Volus…and of course human tongue.
The structure of their brain was a complete mystery though, as none of our lab rats had set his paws on a living specimen…as for the dead ones, the inside of their head looked like a greenish sea sponge.
I knew cuz’ at the battle for the Demon star , I popped some of their cousins’ skull open with a nice headshot, hooah !
Anyways, I didn’t really give a Krogan’s tit about all this scientific babbling, what mattered is that they wanted the same god damn thing as we did, promethium, and lots of it at that !
A first, it looked like we’d get along just fine with the φ’s , but then something happened the brass obviously did not see coming, and things got pretty ugly, pardon my french…
Those amphibian warmongering bastards betrayed us and attacked civilians with full strength, in endless waves of psionic attacks and plasma bombs, and we got the shit kicked out of us.
Sure we fought back, but they had the element of surprise, and with reinforcements thousands of light-years away and unaware, it didn’t go so well…
We lost a squad, then two, then the ammo went scarce, then we started going melee against these hulks with plasma cutters scavenged from the dead miners. We had to do the job with sweet fuck all!
After shitting on our heads, the Bolos went underground close to the promethium core, cut off all communication with Central Command.
Again, they sent us, Space Legionnaires, to bury this place, cause “if we can’t have it, hell, bloody nobody can !” Admiral B. Lockhead’s own words.
Afer all, t’was with the Admiral it all started, at the big “peace” summit on QX25’s Citadel and military HQ.
The φ’s had been there for a while now, and the ore at the surface was nearly depleted, but everyone knew the core held some more of the stuff, “salts” as the white coats said, as it was combined with other elements deep under the thick crust of rock and metal.
We thought of asking the amphibians for help, but then they’d probably want a piece of the cake, so even grindmeat like me got that one right : one of us had to go, of its own free will, or with a marine’s boot up his alien ass…
Our boss made that quite clear to the squiddies in an exhilarating speech (yep I know sum’ fancy words), and even got me and my squad mates intimidated in the process.
The bluff seemed to be working, because I recall the Bolos warlord, suitably called “Amphi”, replying in stellar English, taking time to spell out each line of his answer very distinctively, knowing that any quiproquo would lead to retaliation with full prejudice from our superior forces (no kidding…) :
Amφ :
“I need to be frank and outspoken about this, so that you choose your course of action wisely…
I firmly believe…
That our two races can be sustained by the limited amount of promethium found on this planet
I refuse to think…
That war is the right path to go as the death toll on your side would be considerable
Therefore I can only conclude…
Humans and Bolos-Amφ can agree on a fair distribution of resources and wealth
And I seriously doubt…
This is going to end in some kind of Armageddon”
…
Damn, I was nothing but cannon fodder and a grunt, but I decided to play it safe and mentally input “Amphi Bolos” into my VR visor, scanning for known weaknesses, then I’d blow his fat face to smithereens with a well-aimed titanium round…oldschool !
I must have done some kind of mental typo cuz my HUD flashed with an antique Wikipedia page : Amphibolos, Greek word for sentences or phrases that can be read in more than one way”.
More than one way uh ?
I recalled the warlord’s speech and rolled it backwards mentally, line after line, and then two things hit me: starting from the end the speech told a whole different story, by the balls of the Elcor, now this is how their twisted mind worked !!!
…the second thing that struck me was the plasma pellet ripping through my body armor and lung…
The whole delegation were also down, shot in the back on their way out.
The admiral distorted face was frozen in a last stupid grin. What a clusterfuck !
As for me, I was barely conscious and choking in my own blood and puke when I saw the butt-ugly warlord bend over my smoking carcass, and I recall him whispering to me, very distinctively:
“Our forces will always prevail over you
I firmly believe!”
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
E-Librarian’s B. Ookworm comments and notes:
Following Grunt T.Hank’s respiratory failure and subsequent cardiac arrest, this DigiRcord ™ was automatically uploaded to central command cloud servers and classified “crimson” (confidential defense) for High Command Council’s eyes only.
Peace negotiation with QX25 colony were immediately resumed, and Arch-Commander Palin (whose xenobiologists eventually had access to a living Bolo specimen for brain matter analysis), only sent a brief three-word memo to the remaining confederal forces on Q’, hoping the Amφ overlord would intercept the communication :
“Draw, o coward !” so it read.
All Bolos listening to those words went bat-shit crazy, processing the message in endless loops, trying to decipher the secret code hidden behind it.
As a result, all Xenosettlers on QX25, Warlord included, soon died of synaptic overload, some highly contagious kind of alien meningitis.
Before drawing his last breath, the ill-advised “Amphi” spread the word to the rest of their hives, in an attempt to warn them from some deadly secret weapon.
It ended up turning the whole Bolos bloodline into an extinct species in a matter of minutes.
Instant supraneural communication has its downside after all.
Urged to reveal the recipe behind another glorious victory, Palin Drome burst out into laughter in front of the cheering crowd :
“Just had to live up to my name, gentlemen !”
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(*) DigiRcord™ is a proprietary technology that transcripts actual mental notes and thoughts into vocal records for instant archiving, on the fly audEbook™ creation, crime solving, matrimonial dispute cases, tax evading trials, among many other uses.
Charging only 1 credit per processed thought, it remains the best bang for your bucks!
Featuring smartfiltering of obscene thoughts for parental control purposes, this tool only pre-requires light synaptic surgery or DigiBrain™ nano-implant (all available at discount prices at your nearest virtual clinic).
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Palindrome is a set of words that can be read both ways, like "Eva, can i see bees in a cave ?"
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VILARCANE
[14] Master
It is a V1 so if you notice something off (spotted a few typos myself) or bad english (sometimes voluntarily cuz the narrator aint well educated ya know :) humour me !
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VILARCANE
[14] Master
Stylistic updates today...V1.1
Noticed your like brucege :)
Noticed your like brucege :)
brucege
[14] Master
Will get to a review during the weekend. Fiction takes a while to process :D
VILARCANE
[14] Master
Nice !
KiraxSummers
[13] Hero
Daaaayum, I missed the 100 page celebrations! T^T Damn you, RL for all this work! Lol, anyway, congratulations on 100 pages!!! :D
*mumble 101 is special too right? Like the Dalmations? grumble...*
Haha, so are you permanently retired now or is that just what you tell us until inspiration strikes? ;)
Haha, so are you permanently retired now or is that just what you tell us until inspiration strikes? ;)
VILARCANE
[14] Master
Thanks for the bubbles Kirax !
Inspiration more for writing now as you can see :)
What about you, any new CAS or background stories ?
Inspiration more for writing now as you can see :)
What about you, any new CAS or background stories ?
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brucege
[14] Master
Just finished the story. The narrator's tone and vocabulary is excellent. I don't know where you pulled all that scientific-sounding jargon, but T. Hank certainly sounds the part of a grizzled, cynical space marine. However, for a man so well-spoken and so knowledgeable of Bolos anatomy, I really don't think he'd stumble over a word as simple as "exoskeleton." You included some highly plausible details that contribute to the realism of your setting, like "synaptic aim," which I imagine to be automatic aim/fire via neuron activation. I did get lost over a couple parts of the story though. What happened between the initial Bolos attack and the peace summit? What did T. Hank see in Amphi's speech that gave away the Bolos attack? How would mere wordplay overload the clearly formidable Bolos brain? The story is already excellent. It just needs a little clarification at some points.
Other Notes:
1. The Bolos' hive communication network reminds me of the "buggers" featured in Ender's Game.
2. T. Hank used the term "Krogans" in an expletive. Is this some kind of tie-in to Mass Effect?
3. The interplanetary promethium mining reminds me a lot of the "planet cracking" featured in Dead Space.
4. I really love SciFi. Almost as much as Charles Dickens.
5. Make CaS/comics for this story!
Other Notes:
1. The Bolos' hive communication network reminds me of the "buggers" featured in Ender's Game.
2. T. Hank used the term "Krogans" in an expletive. Is this some kind of tie-in to Mass Effect?
3. The interplanetary promethium mining reminds me a lot of the "planet cracking" featured in Dead Space.
4. I really love SciFi. Almost as much as Charles Dickens.
5. Make CaS/comics for this story!
brucege
[14] Master
You eat tacos?
VILARCANE
[14] Master
Just finished the story. The narrator's tone and vocabulary is excellent.
Thanks so much, means a lot to me. I don't know where you pulled all that scientific-sounding jargon, but T. Hank certainly sounds the part of a grizzled, cynical space marine.
However, for a man so well-spoken and so knowledgeable of Bolos anatomy, I really don't think he'd stumble over a word as simple as "exoskeleton."
yeah, just a gimmick ! My brother also french also told me i should have written : nuts and bolts 'stead of nook and crannies when describing his outfit, i guess he is right :)
You included some highly plausible details that contribute to the realism of your setting, like "synaptic aim," which I imagine to be automatic aim/fire via neuron activation.
Abso-fucking-lutely, hooah ! I did get lost over a couple parts of the story though. What happened between the initial Bolos attack and the peace summit?
They went underground, leaving the surviving colonists to their grusome resourceless fate (but maybe i did too big of an ellipse right here)
What did T. Hank see in Amphi's speech that gave away the Bolos attack?
Now that sir you can only understand if you do what T.Hank did (Tank, a reference to MMORPGs damage absorbing builds, also B.ookworm, and B.Lockhead puns you might have missed)...
Read the speech from the last line up, reading each line after the other from the start and it says what exactly huh ?...i can see the smile on your face even from behind my screen as you read it...
It is the pitch of the whole novel, mon ami !
How would mere wordplay overload the clearly formidable Bolos brain?
Yeah, that is probably a bit OTT, but how would you know the weakness of this species, and why should they be aware of what humour or wordplay is in the first place, which is a human trait (and those don't seem very funny), the point of it was being fun and a tad parodic :)
The story is already excellent. It just needs a little clarification at some points.
Other Notes:
1. The Bolos' hive communication network reminds me of the "buggers" featured in Ender's Game.
Oh didn't think of that but yes !
2. T. Hank used the term "Krogans" in an expletive. Is this some kind of tie-in to Mass Effect?
Some kind of wink, like ascari, volus and drell (only minor changes in the name for some except Volus and Krogan)
3. The interplanetary promethium mining reminds me a lot of the "planet cracking" featured in Dead Space.
Excellent games, at least 1 and 3 (3 being the most underrated game of all time, a hidden gem of absolute perfection. Genius sound design.
4. I really love SciFi. Almost as much as Charles Dickens.
Cool ! Both of them
5. Make CaS/comics for this story!
Nah can't do [/quote]
Thanks so much, means a lot to me. I don't know where you pulled all that scientific-sounding jargon, but T. Hank certainly sounds the part of a grizzled, cynical space marine.
However, for a man so well-spoken and so knowledgeable of Bolos anatomy, I really don't think he'd stumble over a word as simple as "exoskeleton."
yeah, just a gimmick ! My brother also french also told me i should have written : nuts and bolts 'stead of nook and crannies when describing his outfit, i guess he is right :)
You included some highly plausible details that contribute to the realism of your setting, like "synaptic aim," which I imagine to be automatic aim/fire via neuron activation.
Abso-fucking-lutely, hooah ! I did get lost over a couple parts of the story though. What happened between the initial Bolos attack and the peace summit?
They went underground, leaving the surviving colonists to their grusome resourceless fate (but maybe i did too big of an ellipse right here)
What did T. Hank see in Amphi's speech that gave away the Bolos attack?
Now that sir you can only understand if you do what T.Hank did (Tank, a reference to MMORPGs damage absorbing builds, also B.ookworm, and B.Lockhead puns you might have missed)...
Read the speech from the last line up, reading each line after the other from the start and it says what exactly huh ?...i can see the smile on your face even from behind my screen as you read it...
It is the pitch of the whole novel, mon ami !
How would mere wordplay overload the clearly formidable Bolos brain?
Yeah, that is probably a bit OTT, but how would you know the weakness of this species, and why should they be aware of what humour or wordplay is in the first place, which is a human trait (and those don't seem very funny), the point of it was being fun and a tad parodic :)
The story is already excellent. It just needs a little clarification at some points.
Other Notes:
1. The Bolos' hive communication network reminds me of the "buggers" featured in Ender's Game.
Oh didn't think of that but yes !
2. T. Hank used the term "Krogans" in an expletive. Is this some kind of tie-in to Mass Effect?
Some kind of wink, like ascari, volus and drell (only minor changes in the name for some except Volus and Krogan)
3. The interplanetary promethium mining reminds me a lot of the "planet cracking" featured in Dead Space.
Excellent games, at least 1 and 3 (3 being the most underrated game of all time, a hidden gem of absolute perfection. Genius sound design.
4. I really love SciFi. Almost as much as Charles Dickens.
Cool ! Both of them
5. Make CaS/comics for this story!
Nah can't do [/quote]
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brucege
[14] Master
Oh shit. I just got it. DAYUMMMMMM
VILARCANE
[14] Master
Praise the Krogan lord ! Brucege enlightened at last :)
VILARCANE
[14] Master
This board is hanging by a thread, so i thought i'd give you guys one last nudge and wink in litterary form (and maybe manage to get a last online party with Le Bello or anyone else before moving to xbox one by the end of next week).
The third and last novel is a contemporary one, let me start with a little disclaimer about the climax (spoiler tab so click when you have read the rest of the story, as usual), i needed this character to achieve the desired parodic effect. I hope you understand this is an artistic license and not meant to harm anyone nor representative of my views and beliefs...
A SHOT IN THE DARK
A contemporary novelette by Vilarcane
The sniper rifle's butt was pressed firmly against my shoulder. The bipod attached to the rifle’s forend
created a steady rest, and I had it buried in a patch of soft dirt for minimal recoil.
This was probably the most important shot of my young life, and any screw-up would have dire
consequences.
I had collected available PED (Previous Engagement Data) on the untraceable rifle I was trusted
with, and made sure not to clean the weapon to keep original zeroing and calibration untampered.
Attune to the surrounding nature, I spent most of the days killing time and making surgical
adjustments to my gear.
The wait would be over soon, so I finally put one in the chamber, after kissing the round’s tip
reverently for good luck.
Choosing the ammo for this job was a no brainer: hollow point boat tail 308 mm bullets, with a
jacket as thin as the edge of my serrated combat blade.
Accuracy was, as always, the alpha and omega for guys pulling extreme long range stunts like me.
Acquiring a target beyond the 0,8 mile mark required intense training and practice.
After hundred hours of theory and double the amount at the range, we were still rookies barely fit
for turkey shooting duty, or so the instructor told us.
Bullet trajectory, point of impact, range, wind direction, velocity, even the density of the air and
the rotation of the earth had to be factored in at such distance from the target.
No matter how much prep work you’d done, there was always the unpredictable, the unexpected,
and what the ballistics geeks called CEP or Circular Error Probable.
Sure, after 10 years on active, some successful ops and more than 50 kills on the counter, we were
given access to better gear and high-end loadout like IR scopes, laser range finders and even drone
reconnaissance.
And if there was any drama, we could always laser designate the whole anthive for a good old GBU airstrike.
I wouldn’t be the one dealing with diplomatic screw-ups anyways.
This op was different though, and very high profile : no spotter to assist and all bombers off the
grid ; this was not the run-of-the-mill intelligence or recon drill, more the ultimate test of nerves
and skills.
Stay out of sight at all costs, said the brief, this is deniable ops 101.
The reputation of our elite team was at stake, and all mission parameters had been redacted to
keep the brass cosy.
Right now, I had other things to worry about: I was starting to cook in my heavy Ghillie suit, and
sweat was dripping down my forehead big time, compromising my night vision.
I sure hope nobody on the other end of the barrel had thermal goggles aimed at my sorry ass,
because then the hand-made jungle camo would be as useful here as a tuxedo and a bowtie.
I pulsed my jaw and peeled my eyes through the reticle : yes ! I could see the outline of what might
be the package through the green-tinted x12 Schmidt and Bender scope.
The foliage prevented me from having a clear line of sight, so I’d have to wait till the target popped
his head out of the bush to be ID positive.
During briefing, I had gotten pretty intimate with this fucker, from the looks of his first date to a
fully-fledged physical and psychological profile.
Damn I even learned his sick torture routines by heart…
I grew to hate him viscerally, not only because I had to watch him for days in the thick of the
monsoon, laying on moist ground littered with hungry creeps twice the size of my thumb, all
genuinely enjoying the complimentary biting, chewing and bloodsucking.
But above all, I hated his guts because he was a higher ranking officer and a treacherous thug,
responsible for hundreds of my USMC mates’ death.
I knew from OpSec he never had second thoughts when using the most despicable guerilla tactics as
a means to any gruesome end: hacking through our servers and surveillance to locate and expose
our undercover assets was his guilty pleasure.
He had chinese UAVs hovering above the jungle most of the time, so I had to use the monthly
maintenance window to terminate him.
This guy was well versed in modern warfare, not the kind of sick drug-dealing junta mobsters we were
used to deal with.
That and he certainly didn’t give a rat’s ass about rules of engagement : not the soldierly type, no,
that much was clear, fame and money attracted him like a moth to a flame though…
Now, now, the show was on! I’d just spotted his chubby silhouette emerge from the maze of vines
and exotic trees, the tip of his cigar glowing like a firefly in the semi-darkness…
This was the moment of truth, I knew the drill and all I had to do was to go through the same old
same old : stay frosty, squeeze, follow-through, and leave the premises as sneakily as possible with
30 stones of equipment on the back…
I always took my shots on the respiratory pause on the down breath, after taking three deep ones.
Once I let all my air out on that last exhale, that 1-to 3-second pause was the money spot.
Then all that was left was to roll a dice mentally and hope I got the bullet drop…dead right !
The suppressor attachment would prevent anyone from pinpointing my location, especially in the
thick of the jungle, and it would negate all kind of muzzle flash, but the gun wasn’t completely
silenced either : i'd have to use ambient noises as cover.
Target had been greenlit long ago, and now it was out in the open :
I slowly squeezed the trigger to the rear until the shot broke, and let it slide slowly into position again to avoid any jerking.
Thud! Game was on; I could only hope Coriolis, mother off all snipers, was on my side today!
Then I heard another loud crack, and everything went dark…
Clipped by a counter-sniper, damn ? I’d never know, nor if I hit my mark…there was nothing but
limbo and void around me, and the only thing I felt was the brutal surge, like 15000 volts coursing
like a spark through my whole body. But how ???
The third and last novel is a contemporary one, let me start with a little disclaimer about the climax (spoiler tab so click when you have read the rest of the story, as usual), i needed this character to achieve the desired parodic effect. I hope you understand this is an artistic license and not meant to harm anyone nor representative of my views and beliefs...
A SHOT IN THE DARK
A contemporary novelette by Vilarcane
The sniper rifle's butt was pressed firmly against my shoulder. The bipod attached to the rifle’s forend
created a steady rest, and I had it buried in a patch of soft dirt for minimal recoil.
This was probably the most important shot of my young life, and any screw-up would have dire
consequences.
I had collected available PED (Previous Engagement Data) on the untraceable rifle I was trusted
with, and made sure not to clean the weapon to keep original zeroing and calibration untampered.
Attune to the surrounding nature, I spent most of the days killing time and making surgical
adjustments to my gear.
The wait would be over soon, so I finally put one in the chamber, after kissing the round’s tip
reverently for good luck.
Choosing the ammo for this job was a no brainer: hollow point boat tail 308 mm bullets, with a
jacket as thin as the edge of my serrated combat blade.
Accuracy was, as always, the alpha and omega for guys pulling extreme long range stunts like me.
Acquiring a target beyond the 0,8 mile mark required intense training and practice.
After hundred hours of theory and double the amount at the range, we were still rookies barely fit
for turkey shooting duty, or so the instructor told us.
Bullet trajectory, point of impact, range, wind direction, velocity, even the density of the air and
the rotation of the earth had to be factored in at such distance from the target.
No matter how much prep work you’d done, there was always the unpredictable, the unexpected,
and what the ballistics geeks called CEP or Circular Error Probable.
Sure, after 10 years on active, some successful ops and more than 50 kills on the counter, we were
given access to better gear and high-end loadout like IR scopes, laser range finders and even drone
reconnaissance.
And if there was any drama, we could always laser designate the whole anthive for a good old GBU airstrike.
I wouldn’t be the one dealing with diplomatic screw-ups anyways.
This op was different though, and very high profile : no spotter to assist and all bombers off the
grid ; this was not the run-of-the-mill intelligence or recon drill, more the ultimate test of nerves
and skills.
Stay out of sight at all costs, said the brief, this is deniable ops 101.
The reputation of our elite team was at stake, and all mission parameters had been redacted to
keep the brass cosy.
Right now, I had other things to worry about: I was starting to cook in my heavy Ghillie suit, and
sweat was dripping down my forehead big time, compromising my night vision.
I sure hope nobody on the other end of the barrel had thermal goggles aimed at my sorry ass,
because then the hand-made jungle camo would be as useful here as a tuxedo and a bowtie.
I pulsed my jaw and peeled my eyes through the reticle : yes ! I could see the outline of what might
be the package through the green-tinted x12 Schmidt and Bender scope.
The foliage prevented me from having a clear line of sight, so I’d have to wait till the target popped
his head out of the bush to be ID positive.
During briefing, I had gotten pretty intimate with this fucker, from the looks of his first date to a
fully-fledged physical and psychological profile.
Damn I even learned his sick torture routines by heart…
I grew to hate him viscerally, not only because I had to watch him for days in the thick of the
monsoon, laying on moist ground littered with hungry creeps twice the size of my thumb, all
genuinely enjoying the complimentary biting, chewing and bloodsucking.
But above all, I hated his guts because he was a higher ranking officer and a treacherous thug,
responsible for hundreds of my USMC mates’ death.
I knew from OpSec he never had second thoughts when using the most despicable guerilla tactics as
a means to any gruesome end: hacking through our servers and surveillance to locate and expose
our undercover assets was his guilty pleasure.
He had chinese UAVs hovering above the jungle most of the time, so I had to use the monthly
maintenance window to terminate him.
This guy was well versed in modern warfare, not the kind of sick drug-dealing junta mobsters we were
used to deal with.
That and he certainly didn’t give a rat’s ass about rules of engagement : not the soldierly type, no,
that much was clear, fame and money attracted him like a moth to a flame though…
Now, now, the show was on! I’d just spotted his chubby silhouette emerge from the maze of vines
and exotic trees, the tip of his cigar glowing like a firefly in the semi-darkness…
This was the moment of truth, I knew the drill and all I had to do was to go through the same old
same old : stay frosty, squeeze, follow-through, and leave the premises as sneakily as possible with
30 stones of equipment on the back…
I always took my shots on the respiratory pause on the down breath, after taking three deep ones.
Once I let all my air out on that last exhale, that 1-to 3-second pause was the money spot.
Then all that was left was to roll a dice mentally and hope I got the bullet drop…dead right !
The suppressor attachment would prevent anyone from pinpointing my location, especially in the
thick of the jungle, and it would negate all kind of muzzle flash, but the gun wasn’t completely
silenced either : i'd have to use ambient noises as cover.
Target had been greenlit long ago, and now it was out in the open :
I slowly squeezed the trigger to the rear until the shot broke, and let it slide slowly into position again to avoid any jerking.
Thud! Game was on; I could only hope Coriolis, mother off all snipers, was on my side today!
Then I heard another loud crack, and everything went dark…
Clipped by a counter-sniper, damn ? I’d never know, nor if I hit my mark…there was nothing but
limbo and void around me, and the only thing I felt was the brutal surge, like 15000 volts coursing
like a spark through my whole body. But how ???
The black wireless controller was already flying through the room and smashed against the wall ofthe safehouse…in a loud crack
Shouting in Arabic:
By Allah, you capitalist prick, you think you are good at this huh ?!!
You were looking at my splitscreen all the time, you cheating scum !
Marine US Sniper E. Schott:
Now now, aren’t we a sore loser, Abdul, never challenge your hostage to a deathmatch !
Man, you are level 45 Assault Class General, with all weapon upgrades and perks,
and you still playing like a retarded noob,
no wonder you guys can’t get your pathetic acts of terror right in real life!
Getting up close and personal, that was the idea…
Abdul, terrorist cell leader:
Naal dine oumouk ! Yes, I pulled the plug before YOU got the frag, ha !
Youuuu…hacker ! Now my save is probably corrupt and look…my console is RROD!
Rhaaaaa….I’ll gut you for this, infidel dog!
The prisoner’s hands were free but his feet were still tightly bound to the sturdy metal chair.
When Abdul lunged at him flailing his rusty machete like a madman, the sniper acted instinctively,
the benefit of infinite hours of training at camp R.
In the blink of an eye, he’d managed to stand up, turn the chair around and ram the terrorist in the
chest at decent speed. 200 lbs. of muscle connected, smacking the middle-eastern game pal against the wall like a helpless fly…
K.O.!
The 2m cord of the white Xbox controller tightened around his neck, and snap! Abdul was banned
from the world’s leaderboards…forever.
Seemed Edd Schott’s sniping days weren’t over yet…
Mission complete, requesting Exfil.
Shouting in Arabic:
By Allah, you capitalist prick, you think you are good at this huh ?!!
You were looking at my splitscreen all the time, you cheating scum !
Marine US Sniper E. Schott:
Now now, aren’t we a sore loser, Abdul, never challenge your hostage to a deathmatch !
Man, you are level 45 Assault Class General, with all weapon upgrades and perks,
and you still playing like a retarded noob,
no wonder you guys can’t get your pathetic acts of terror right in real life!
Getting up close and personal, that was the idea…
Abdul, terrorist cell leader:
Naal dine oumouk ! Yes, I pulled the plug before YOU got the frag, ha !
Youuuu…hacker ! Now my save is probably corrupt and look…my console is RROD!
Rhaaaaa….I’ll gut you for this, infidel dog!
The prisoner’s hands were free but his feet were still tightly bound to the sturdy metal chair.
When Abdul lunged at him flailing his rusty machete like a madman, the sniper acted instinctively,
the benefit of infinite hours of training at camp R.
In the blink of an eye, he’d managed to stand up, turn the chair around and ram the terrorist in the
chest at decent speed. 200 lbs. of muscle connected, smacking the middle-eastern game pal against the wall like a helpless fly…
K.O.!
The 2m cord of the white Xbox controller tightened around his neck, and snap! Abdul was banned
from the world’s leaderboards…forever.
Seemed Edd Schott’s sniping days weren’t over yet…
Mission complete, requesting Exfil.
brucege
[14] Master
Damnit, you always end your stories like that! I was really getting into this one too. Reads like a scene from a legit sniper movie. As usual, immersion is your strong suit. My favorite line was the comparison of jungle camo to a tux and bowtie under thermovision. I actually laughed out loud while reading that one. Very cool.
VILARCANE
[14] Master
Man, you actually made my thread reach page 102 :)
Thanks for taking the time to leave this comment, means much to me bro, seems the others have deserted me (and we are yet to manage to bump into one another with Le Bello)...
Well, technically, i did not end the story the usual way by making the hero die...in this one, only the bad guy dies, the other virtual hero is just being...unplugged :)
I did write another novelette since, one in french though, a bit more ambitious than the first 3, sci-fi themed, but unless you are well versed in the language of Molière, i'll spare you this one.
Thanks for taking the time to leave this comment, means much to me bro, seems the others have deserted me (and we are yet to manage to bump into one another with Le Bello)...
Well, technically, i did not end the story the usual way by making the hero die...in this one, only the bad guy dies, the other virtual hero is just being...unplugged :)
I did write another novelette since, one in french though, a bit more ambitious than the first 3, sci-fi themed, but unless you are well versed in the language of Molière, i'll spare you this one.
brucege
[14] Master
Haha anytime, brother. If you're too lazy to translate it into English, just shove it into Babel Fish and post it raw! lol
VILARCANE
[14] Master
Babel fish would barely stand a chance, as the novelette is full of neologisms i invented...the first part of the text would be ok but i tried to put bf to the test and the first word input it simply couldn't handle.
Nobody surpasses my otherworldly artistic skillz lol not even the mightiest metatranslator muhahahaaaa !...:p
Nobody surpasses my otherworldly artistic skillz lol not even the mightiest metatranslator muhahahaaaa !...:p
ThePascuzzi
[13] Hero
Out of all the CaS in this thread since the Daft Punk pair, Citrouille is probably my favorite. The most noticeable thing about the design is the pumpkin hat. Using the tip of the hat as a stem is very clever and the Hearts work very well, but I was wondering why you stopped at two. Pumpkins usually have more than four sections, so adding in a third Heart for a total of six sections would've yielded a slightly more accurate pumpkin construction. Of course, the design is noteworthy for more than its hat. The entire design is unified by its orange, brown, and green vegetation-related patterns, which strongly impart an autumnal theme. Though the patterns are well executed in places, such as the chest and torso, there are just too many of them running wild, vying for attention. As a result, the design looks a little random and thrown-together, almost like a patchwork quilt, despite the patterns all being related to the same theme. Using the crocodile skin pattern to simulate pumpkin rind is interesting, though, and I'd have liked to see it on parts that would plausibly be more leathery than others, such as the boots and gauntlets. I'd also have liked to see stickers play a bigger role in the overall design, as currently, the patterns are the major method of adding texture to each item. That's not to say this use of stickers is completely absent: subtle detail is added around the collar and the star-sash complex on the back is interesting when viewed from the side. It almost looks like a flower with its stem.
I like when people make CaS based on themselves. It's a nice way to see what the creator is like, how s/he sees him/herself, and what s/he likes in characters and stories. Naturally, the Level 1 and 9 Vilarcane CaS caught my interest, but I'll only remark on the Level 1 design, since I believe it's the stronger of the two. The torso emblem is very interesting; it effectively centralizes and focuses the overall wizard theme of the design. The bump mapping star sticker looks great on the centerpiece of the Large Stone Necklace, as does the rose stripe pattern on the coat. Features of the design I don't like include the sleeves: I think they're much too bulky to be used on their own like that. They look as though they're magically floating around his arms. I know he's a wizard, but c'mon. I'm also confused by the patterning on the body suit. I find it reminiscent of fishnet used on ninja designs, such as on a few Taki CaS, thus inappropriate for a wizard. There's also the break between the socks and the body suit just under the knees. I think full leggings through the knees, if possible, would clean up that part of the design. The hat suffers a bit from pattern overload. Consider a more subtle pattern or even block off parts of the hat with stickers. The spell book is a nice construction, but I'd have lengthened it more to give it more typical proportions.
The stone statue of Athena, though relatively simple, is also a noteworthy design. The use of the pattern to simulate stone armor looks very nice and the dlc equipment fits in very well. However, I'm curious as to why you chose to keep the skin exposed. Could nothing be done to make it look more like stone? Perhaps a body suit with some clever stickerwork and/or patterning? Either way, it's a nice design.
I like when people make CaS based on themselves. It's a nice way to see what the creator is like, how s/he sees him/herself, and what s/he likes in characters and stories. Naturally, the Level 1 and 9 Vilarcane CaS caught my interest, but I'll only remark on the Level 1 design, since I believe it's the stronger of the two. The torso emblem is very interesting; it effectively centralizes and focuses the overall wizard theme of the design. The bump mapping star sticker looks great on the centerpiece of the Large Stone Necklace, as does the rose stripe pattern on the coat. Features of the design I don't like include the sleeves: I think they're much too bulky to be used on their own like that. They look as though they're magically floating around his arms. I know he's a wizard, but c'mon. I'm also confused by the patterning on the body suit. I find it reminiscent of fishnet used on ninja designs, such as on a few Taki CaS, thus inappropriate for a wizard. There's also the break between the socks and the body suit just under the knees. I think full leggings through the knees, if possible, would clean up that part of the design. The hat suffers a bit from pattern overload. Consider a more subtle pattern or even block off parts of the hat with stickers. The spell book is a nice construction, but I'd have lengthened it more to give it more typical proportions.
The stone statue of Athena, though relatively simple, is also a noteworthy design. The use of the pattern to simulate stone armor looks very nice and the dlc equipment fits in very well. However, I'm curious as to why you chose to keep the skin exposed. Could nothing be done to make it look more like stone? Perhaps a body suit with some clever stickerwork and/or patterning? Either way, it's a nice design.