Soul calibur 7: Silly speculation

Agnosticheaven

Agnosticheaven

[08] Mercenary
Okay bare with me here... What will happen...And how will it happen

IN SOUL CALIBUR SEVENNNNNNNNN

(This is a thread to make fun of the game, rather than speculate)
 
The series finally gets an "M" rating.
There well be an rpg campaign a lot like Soul Calibur Legends
Ivy's model will be replaced by an enormous pair of sagging boobs
Pyrrha will be older and dress like Sophitia did in SCIV (I want this)
Natsu becomes exactly like Taki; big lemon tits and all
Voldo will have no bones and have a snake motif
Siegfried gets is own tier level
Equipment destruction renders a character completely naked, hence why it is rated "M"
BE, CE, CF, all make it back
Step G is accidently included
Every playstyle from previous iterations will be playable, thus making it the most broken, unplayable title in the series
 
The series goes through another timeskip. Melee weapons are no longer effective as instruments of warfare. History's most worthy swordsmen have all been felled by the technological superiority of the firearm. In order to keep up with the times, Soul Edge and Soul Calibur have transformed into guns and the series leaves the fighter genre to become an FPS.

SOUL GUNS
"Transcending history and the world, a tale of souls and swords guns, eternally retold..."
 
No currently existing movesets and weapon styles make it to SCVII. There is now only a roster of 8 characters, all with completely new weapons and movesets.

Also, there is no Story Mode. Nothing is explained to you. Hell, there's not even a guide book. Have fun.
 
Soul Calibur and Soul Edge become political parties, and the game becomes a turn-based fighter where the fighters -- who are only white-- don't actually physically fight one-another, they just say mean things. And then you have to train future generations to follow their masters' beliefs. And Algol becomes OJ Simpson, and you have to have a trial for him, and other incarnations of algol represent every other race-based trail since 1BCE. And alpha and omega styles are combined. 214 3a:B can be done up to 4 times by spamming B. And there is now a Quad Nemesis Step BBBBB. These moves are only for insulting your opponents. And there are no black people in the game.
 
They take away the block mechanic, and also take away all recovery times. Now, the game will be a true spamfest as the person who smashes buttons faster always wins.

Also, Siegfried's and NM's weapons are now giant dildo's instead of swords. This is to correct any confusion that people wrongfully think that these characters are manly.

Lizardman is now the size of the Geico Lizard.

CE input is simply A+B+K with no directional input.

GI has a 200 frame window, tracks 100%, and gives you +50 frames.

Air control has been removed, so has 8wr. There is no longer a difference between horizontal and vertical moves. Basically, SC becomes 2D.

Only 2 characters are actually good, Beavis and Butthead. Everyone else is garbage tier.

If you lose 2 rounds in a row the game automatically gives you a free round.

When you lose to a person, the game says "there there, little boy, you don't suck, your opponent is just a cheap-ass".

I could go on, but I'm stopping here :)
 
All the Soul Calibur characters you know and love will be removed except for Yoshimitsu.
To compensate for this, new styles will be added. In addition to Devil Jin, you will also be able to use soul of Jin, Kazuya, Heihachi, Law, King, Nina, Anna... I think you know where I'm going with this.


Or alternatively: Patroklos will be the only character in the game. All other styles will belong to the characters Alpha Patroklos, Beta Patroklos, Gamma Patroklos, etc...
 
Off topic: please try to give your threads more descriptive titles.

On topic: I posted this in a thread a while back.

UnseenWombat said:
How do I see it? Well if things continue on the path they are now we'll have Nightmare and Seigfried with their own movesets, (Nightmare will have an i7 unblockable that does 180 damage, and none of Seigfried's moves will actually hit).

We'll also have Sophie back, Cassandra, Pyrrha, Patroklos, Rothion (raised from the dead... because Soul Edge... or something), Sophie's uncle and third cousin, and Soph and Cass's brother Lucius, as well as alpha, beta, omega, epsilon naught and chi-squared versions of each one. All of them will use sword and shield with subtle variations between them, except the Chi-squared version for some unexplained reason will have Grieve Edge's moveset. (The reason will actually be explained in the art book, but it will only be published in Swahili and distributed to Ellesmere Island).

About half the rest of the SC5 cast will be in, but they'll be mimics, because... astral chaos... or something. The rest of the characters will be gone, with the reasons only explained in the Swahili art book.

That's how I see the roster shaping up for SC6.
Click to expand...
 
ThePascuzzi said:
The series goes through another timeskip. Melee weapons are no longer effective as instruments of warfare. History's most worthy swordsmen have all been felled by the technological superiority of the firearm. In order to keep up with the times, Soul Edge and Soul Calibur have transformed into guns and the series leaves the fighter genre to become an FPS.

SOUL GUNS
"Transcending history and the world, a tale of souls and swords guns, eternally retold..."
Click to expand...

That's actually a cool idea. The only way you'd please the SC crowd and the FPS crowd is to use a different team for each one. Project Soul for the fighting game and an FPS company for the spinoff. I'd actually want a revamped Project Soul with regards to budget, devs, and direction. I want the beautiful graphics the Tekken series has and the creative stages. As much as I like those fun stages in SCIV and SCV, I would like some of the ones along the visual style and design choices of T6. I think they did go more towards this direction for SCV, but I want more. I'm sick of those caged stages from a visual standpoint.
 
ThePascuzzi said:
The series goes through another timeskip. Melee weapons are no longer effective as instruments of warfare. History's most worthy swordsmen have all been felled by the technological superiority of the firearm. In order to keep up with the times, Soul Edge and Soul Calibur have transformed into guns and the series leaves the fighter genre to become an FPS.

SOUL GUNS
"Transcending history and the world, a tale of souls and swords guns, eternally retold..."
Click to expand...

 
OMG.

I TOLD YOU.

Soon the entire cast will be all Sophitia's inbred Family!!!
 
HolyCarp said:
All the Soul Calibur characters you know and love will be removed except for Yoshimitsu.
To compensate for this, new styles will be added. In addition to Devil Jin, you will also be able to use soul of Jin, Kazuya, Heihachi, Law, King, Nina, Anna... I think you know where I'm going with this.


Or alternatively: Patroklos will be the only character in the game. All other styles will belong to the characters Alpha Patroklos, Beta Patroklos, Gamma Patroklos, etc...
Click to expand...
Congratulations, you just made Tekken.
 
SCVII will be based in the far future and all characters will pilot mechs.

Guest characters from the Virtual-On series, Neon Genesis Evangelion and Metal Gear Solid will feature, also Pac Man using the same robot he pilots in Streetfighter X Tekken.
 
SCVII will be, for the first time ever in the series...A WRESTLING GAME!!!

All your favorite Soul Calibur characters past and present, can now settle their differences in the squared circle! Complete with chair shots, blood, and storylines...REAL STORYLINES!!! Ever dreamed about seeing Xiba and Leixia put through a table, now you can! Ever wanted to do an angle involving the Alexandras in their incestuous relationship, now you can!

Soul Calibur VII: THE WRESTLING GAME!!!

with Guest Characters:
King
Armor King
Craig Marduk
Jaycee/Julia Chang
Ganryu
Hulk Hogan (PS3)
The Undertaker (Xbox 360)
The Rock and Stone Cold Steve Austin (Nintendo Wii)
John Cena,Randy Orton, Brock Lesnar, Bret Hart and Rey Mysterio (PS Vita and Wii U Exclusive)
 
ShaolinTiger86 said:
SCVII will be, for the first time ever in the series...A WRESTLING GAME!!!

All your favorite Soul Calibur characters past and present, can now settle their differences in the squared circle! Complete with chair shots, blood, and storylines...REAL STORYLINES!!! Ever dreamed about seeing Xiba and Leixia put through a table, now you can! Ever wanted to do an angle involving the Alexandras in their incestuous relationship, now you can!

Soul Calibur VII: THE WRESTLING GAME!!!

with Guest Characters:
King
Armor King
Craig Marduk
Jaycee/Julia Chang
Ganryu
Hulk Hogan (PS3)
The Undertaker (Xbox 360)
The Rock and Stone Cold Steve Austin (Nintendo Wii)
John Cena,Randy Orton, Brock Lesnar, Bret Hart and Rey Mysterio (PS Vita and Wii U Exclusive)
Click to expand...


LMAAAO XDDD and yay i get The Undertaker!
 
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